Karsten
born: Black Forest
height: 6ft
weight: 200lbs
position: bending down to pick ball out of
net.
hobbies: lubricating goalie gloves with linseed oil, sitting,
racing hot
wheels.
likes: S & M, potting plants, watching clouds go
by.
dislikes: getting beat every week, his defence, how Steven
Seagal is not taken seriously as an actor.
favourite football moment: any second he is
not playing on this team.
least favourite football moment: the
warmup.
best sex: various fruits and vegatables
favourite film: Escape To Victory, when Michael Caine
breaks the goalie's arm so Stallone can play instead.
favourite book: The Art Of War
career: bicycle repair man
say something about yourself: " Keep Roy away
from me "
Damien
born: in a few minutes
height: a staggering 5ft 10in
weight: check in ratio to Louie's appendage, multiply by
3.14
position: defence / leaning on the bar.
hobbies: collecting fat women porno mags, belly dancing,
intro
fertilization process.
likes: The democracy of The Republic of Congo, flicking
cigarette buts at wheelchair bound seniors.
dislikes: authority figures, plastacine,
seeing.
favourite football moment: the joy felt at
signing for Real Ale.
least favourite moment: the second he realized that this was
not THAT Real Madrid team.
best sex: team bus on the way to Peterborough a few years
ago
favourite film: The Omen.
favourite book: The Illustrated Works Of Ian
G.
career: whale blubber salesman
say something about yourself: "in the beginning,
I created a new breed of super budgies, who will rise above man and rule
the world..."
Darren
born: just a bit too late.
height: 6ft 0in
weight: oh my God.
position: left back and occasionally goal and occasionally
unable to get up.
hobbies: Buns Of Steel, flying a kite, buying houses that
crumble to
pieces.
likes: his tools, dog, ink blots
dislikes: German food, clowns, marching to his own
beat
favourite football moment: THAT
goal.
least favourite moment: being the victim of a Jamaician hitman
during a game.
best sex: yuck
favourite film: The Teletubbies in
France
favourite book: Weight Loss For The Under
30's
career: bum crack voyeur
say something about yourself: " Another beer Mr.
Probert ?"